This week marks one year since my Grandad passed away. I know Grandad’s are supposed to eventually pass, so there is some sort of acceptance that goes with that, especially when life is painful. I’m not convinced it makes it any easier though. It’s the memories, the connections, the things you had in common, the rituals and conversations you shared that are also being grieved. What I have learned this past year though is there is a part, a connection, a purpose, or some sort of energy that remains. I also learnt what to call this energy and how to use it as a key to unlock a life less ordinary, and a key to your weight loss and health dreams coming true.
I’ve worked in a leadership or coaching role for 15 years now and regardless of the role, the process is similar; establish what the goal is, usually in the form of a nice ‘SMART’ goal, get clarity on the current situation, uncover barriers to success, look at options to close the gap on the goal and current situation, create a plan and follow up.
But there is one thing missing.
This equation may get some goals, most of the time it won’t. The ‘some’ goals it does works for, are far less than the potential outcomes that are available with ‘the key’.
I mentioned this ‘energy’ that remained after my Grandad’s passing. To be more specific, it was purpose and passion that was so strong it dragged my arthritic body to the starting line of a marathon this year. Every bone in my body, my gut, my head all told me it was not possible. I had a ‘SMART’ goal, I knew where I was at, I had an action plan, I got slapped in the face with my barriers and I almost gave up a number of times.
In tears with the realisation that I might never achieve this goal, I would remember him. My Grandad. I would remember him ‘shuffling’ up over the hill to Tutukaka in his late 70’s, I would remember his eyes light up when I talked to him about my athletic achievements. I remembered his determination, his stubbornness, his pride. Tears would role down my face, a ball form in my throat, my heart heavy and then I would laugh. Through my teary eyes I saw possibility.
This energy or purpose comes from having a goal that is bigger than just a ‘SMART’ goal. Its about finding something that you are so passionate about, it makes your cry, it makes your heart skip a beat, it sets your soul on fire. If your goal is just to lose weight, you can forget the ‘goal/reality/barriers/action/follow up’ model. It won’t work. Because when it comes to the crunch and things get hard – and they will – there’s no heart, no passion.
So why do you want to lose weight? Is to be active with your kids? What would it mean to them, what would it mean to you? Hear their laughs, see their face light up, to feel energetic, as you chase them, to not worry about what you look like……. Feel it, write a story about what it looks like, paint a picture, a vision board, engage all your senses and increase the energy, the passion with in you and do it daily. Then when you look at that coffee, that cake, that cheeseburger, it all seems insignificant compared to that energy, that passion, that place you are going to. You want something so much more, and you deserve it.
The key is ‘Why’ not ‘How’….
In memory of Selwyn Anderson 08/12/2015